Family
Sleep deprived, sore, frustrations & the occasional weep. This is by far the most difficult journey I’ve ever been on. I actually wouldn’t change a thing, aside from turning M into a baby that could sleep without being held during the day. On that note, how good is my one handed typing?
This is a strange time, where I grieve for the life I had & discovering what my new life entails whilst trying to enjoy the shining moments of these first few very very hard weeks. Balancing the emotions of wondering why I feel so suddenly overwhelmed about everything with feeling my growing love for our baby. Wondering if I’ll ever feel rested again. Hearing her start to awaken and trying to pretend she’s still sleeping for just another ten minutes. I hold out for the magic time where it all fits into place and we emerge like butterflies from a cocoon.
She loves music & goes to sleep in less than 2 minutes if Paul Kelly is blaring. We spend a lot of the day singing and listening to music. It makes sense - she spent her entire time in utero on stage with me singing loudly, and always hearing music.
All this aside, she smells divine, smiles like a champion, gurgles and coos & had her first laugh yesterday! And I paddle happily alongside, drinking in the mini-me that stares at me with the most beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen.